Brokenness in the hands of God

I began a new study that is proving to be more of God's perfect timing of meeting me where I am. I hope this will encourage you the way it has me. I love the way God doesn't turn from our brokenness and leave us on our own the way some people tend to do. 

This study is from Angela Thomas, called, "Living your life as a Beautiful Offering" I have taken out the underlined portions that spoke to me.

Good intentions are how I start most everything, but somewhere along the way my humanity usually kicks in. When life's moments are more than I can take, I cry. Ever cried yourself to sleep? Exhaustion seemed to highlight every area of my brokenness. It magnified my frustration over every imperfection. The places this poverty of spirit take me can be depressing; paralyzing; and overwhelming. When I hit the wall, my energy is gone, my heart is flat, and all i can see are my flaws. I begin to evaluate every area of my life like I'm a failure. I can hear my poor spirit making out a list: I should bake more, and dust more, and give more, and exercise more and play more and pray more-

It's embarrassing to come to Jesus with a poor spirit. I think, Look at all God has done for me. I should be stronger, I should be an overcomer. I should have renewed energy because of my joy over His love for me. I should be healed by now. More godly by now. Near perfect by now. 

There is blessing for the poor in spirit. 

Psalm 34:18 He is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit

Psalm 147:3 He heals and binds up the wounded

Isaiah 61:1 He will bind up the brokenhearted

Figure out where you are. Take the truth of where you are and lift it to heaven. 

I can find myself mostly embarrassed that I still have this stuff to deal with. However, what is important is that my poor spirit is turned toward God. What is inward is being turned upward, handed over to my heavenly Father. We must have TRUTH before God. Freedom only comes from openness. Desire the presence of God instead of the shadows of loneliness or the distraction of sin.